Psychoanalysis
Ready for the deep dive?
I’m bringing back the day. The day when psychoanalysis was a short(er)-term intensive.
Is your life is relatively stable, that is to say—do you have some room for it to get disrupted and not go entirely off the rails?
Good. I’m going to ask you to hold steady for a year, i.e. no marriage or divorce, no baby, no move across country, no quitting your job in a blaze of glory.
I’m going to help you learn how to tolerate holding the tension in your life, observe it, and ultimately imagine new possibilities to create change that comes from within.
You’ve likely had some therapy before and it might’ve been ho-hum. Or what you had was good, but going back for a tune-up might just feel like a repeat.
You’ve been doing ok, but recently you’ve noticed…
There’s an elephant in the living room of your life—it’s becoming increasingly obvious. Ignoring it is an option. You can continue to live in the corner behind the end table and pretend like there’s enough room. From there you can create an avatar on social media, and live vicariously through that person, whoever that is. Or perhaps you have a real-life persona that is going through the motions in life, doing all the things, while you’re feeling increasingly isolated.
Those are some ways you can handle life, or, you can start feeling out the wrinkly hide of your problems and learn to figure out the difference between the elephant’s ass and your own elbow. It might be messy, or a little bit scary, or perhaps absurd. All you know is that addressing this reality is starting to feel preferable to the state you’re in now.
Becoming someone who takes on life’s challenges in a thoughtful, compassionate, and direct way takes time. It’s ok to need help. It’s really a complex task to learn how to navigate our way and find wellness in a world that seems increasingly sick.
A person does not exist in a vacuum, but in an ever-changing context. We often adapt to our environments—whether they be geographical, cultural, communal, occupational or relational—and unfortunately sometimes these adaptations can negatively impact our sense of self and inhibit agency.
Let me help you become your own center in the midst of everything else.
I know, I know. You had it easy. There was always a roof over your head and food on the table. Maybe your parents even paid for you to go to private school. You don’t want to complain. GOD FORBID! Ever consider that you don’t want to complain because you were taught that voicing yourself in this way was wrong?
This isn’t about blaming your parents, ok—I actually find that a very boring way to go about this—but it IS possible things were not 100% awesome and now you’ve got some unpacking to do.
First thing—unpack the shame about asking and paying for help.
If you are coming from a position of relative power—that is, you are not struggling to have your basic needs met and have the resources to dig deep into your own mental health—you are not only doing yourself a favor by taking responsibility for yourself, but you are doing others a solid by not enacting your disavowed woundedness in all sorts of bizarre ways.
Believe me, we’re in strange times, and some of the stuff we’re seeing is the result of intergenerational, unaddressed trauma.
You wish the world were a better place. So, get better.
People who have had intensive therapy are often better partners. Better parents. Better co-workers. Better bosses. Better creatives. Better neighbors. Better change-makers. Better problem-solvers. When one of us gets better—deeply better—not just ticking-the-box-I-did-the-thing better, we increase the chances of us all getting better.
I’m hopeful like that. And you can be, too.
You won’t be perfect on the other side of it, because being human is an on-going project, but you will find a new capacity for ongoing self-reflection, meaning, and connection that will continue to serve you.
See if it’s for you…